The Lost Purse

I remember the excitement and the terrible alarm
That worried everybody when William broke
his arm;
An’ how frantic Pa and Ma got only jes’ the
other day
When they couldn’t find the baby coz he’d up
an’ walked away;
But I’m sure there’s no excitement that our house
has ever shook
Like the times Ma can’t remember where she’s
put her pocketbook.
When the laundry man is standin’ at the door an’
wants his pay
Ma hurries in to get it, an’ the fun starts right
away.
She hustles to the sideboard, coz she knows
exactly where
She can put her hand right on it, but alas ! it isn’t
there.
She tries the parlor table an’ she goes upstairs
to look,
An’ once more she can’t remember where she put
her pocketbook.
She tells us that she had it just a half an hour
ago,
An’ now she cannot find it though she’s hunted
high and low ;
She’s searched the kitchen cupboard an’ the
bureau drawers upstairs,
An’ it’s not behind the sofa nor beneath the par
lor chairs.
She makes us kids get busy searching every little
nook,
An’ this time says she’s certain that she’s lost
her pocketbook.
She calls Pa at the office an’ he laughs I guess,
for then
She always mumbles something ’bout the heart-
lessness of men.
She calls to mind a peddler who came to the
kitchen door,
An’ she’s certain from his whiskers an’ the
shabby clothes he wore
An’ his dirty shirt an’ collar that he must have
been a crook,
An’ she’s positive that feller came and got her
pocketbook.
But at last she allus finds it in some queer an’
funny spot,
Where she’d put it in a hurry, an’ had somehow
clean forgot;

An’ she heaves a sigh of gladness, an’ she says,
” Well, I declare,
I would take an oath this minute that I never put
it there.”
An’ we’re peaceable an’ quiet till next time Ma
goes to look
An’ finds she can’t remember where she put her
pocketbook.

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