Attitude Determines Attitude!

I woke up early today, excited over all I get to do before the clock strikes midnight.

I have responsibilities to fulfill today.

I am important. My job is to choose what kind of day I am going to have.

Today I can complain because the weather is rainy or I can be thankful that the grass is getting watered for free.

Today I can feel sad that I don’t have more money or I can be glad that my finances encourage me to plan my purchases wisely and guide me away from waste.

Today I can grumble about my health or I can rejoice that I am alive.

Today I can lament over all that my parents didn’t give me when I was growing up or I can feel grateful that they allowed me to be born.

Today I can cry because roses have thorns or I can celebrate that thorns have roses.

Today I can mourn my lack of friends or I can excitedly embark upon a quest to discover new relationships.

Today I can whine because I have to go to work or I can shout for joy because I have a job to do.

Today I can complain because I have to go to school or eagerly open my mind and fill it with rich new tidbits of knowledge.

Today I can murmur dejectedly because I have to do housework or I can feel honored because the Lord has provided shelter for my mind, body and soul.

Today stretches ahead of me, waiting to be shaped. And here I am, the sculptor who gets to do the shaping.

What today will be like is up to me. I get to choose what kind of day I will have!

Have a Great Day … Unless you have other plans.

Author Unknown

Meeting Facilitation: 6 Tips to Conduct Meetings That Don’t Suck

I LOVE this post by my friend Regis, over at Dot Connector.

What is Meeting Facilitation?

Meeting facilitation is the art of conducting successful meetings regardless of the topic, the attendees, or the location.

Successful meetings…

1. Only last as long as absolutely necessary
2. Create a forum for ideas and/or results to be openly discussed
3. End with actionable next steps that everyone agrees on

If the person conducting the meeting is skilled in meeting facilitation, they will be able to effectively achieve each of these three keys to a successful meeting.  Here’s how to do it.      >Finish reading.

Urgent Needs in Utah – Regarding orphans from Haiti

I just received this from my dear friend, Bev at BevsCountryCottage.

Good Evening Everyone! I just received a call from our local church leaders regarding The Christmas Box House in Salt Lake City, they will be receiving orphans from Haiti in the next few days. The children will be arriving to a new climate and without winter items to stay warm. The urgent need is Coats, Boys & Girls, Size 6 & 8. I am sure hats and mittens would be appreciated as well.

The coats will be needed ASAP. If anyone in Utah can help, please let me know. I am working on contact information to see what other needs we can help with.

A Christmas Message

Christ: The Real Gift of Christmas

By focusing on your loved ones, enjoying or building holiday traditions, and following the Savior’s example of service, you can give yourself and your family true, lasting Christmas gifts.

For more beautiful Christmas messages, go here.

Death of the Old Year

Full knee-deep lies the winter snow,
And the winter winds are wearily sighing:
Toll ye the church bell sad and slow,
And tread softly and speak low,
For the old year lies a-dying.
Old year you must not die;
You came to us so readily,
You lived with us so steadily,
Old year you shall not die.

He lieth still: he doth not move:
He will not see the dawn of day.
He hath no other life above.
He gave me a friend and a true truelove
And the New-year will take ‘em away.
Old year you must not go;
So long you have been with us,
Such joy as you have seen with us,
Old year, you shall not go.

He froth’d his bumpers to the brim;
A jollier year we shall not see.
But tho’ his eyes are waxing dim,
And tho’ his foes speak ill of him,
He was a friend to me.
Old year, you shall not die;
We did so laugh and cry with you,
I’ve half a mind to die with you,
Old year, if you must die.

He was full of joke and jest,
But all his merry quips are o’er.
To see him die across the waste
His son and heir doth ride post-haste,
But he’ll be dead before.
Every one for his own.
The night is starry and cold, my friend,
And the New-year blithe and bold, my friend,
Comes up to take his own.

How hard he breathes! over the snow
I heard just now the crowing cock.
The shadows flicker to and fro:
The cricket chirps: the light burns low:
‘Tis nearly twelve o’clock.
Shake hands, before you die.
Old year, we’ll dearly rue for you:
What is it we can do for you?
Speak out before you die.

His face is growing sharp and thin.
Alack! our friend is gone,
Close up his eyes: tie up his chin:
Step from the corpse, and let him in
That standeth there alone,
And waiteth at the door.
There’s a new foot on the floor, my friend,
And a new face at the door, my friend,
A new face at the door.

Life’s Handbook for 2009

This is a great list of guidelines to live by.  I received it in an email and and loved it!  I especially like “Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.”  So true!

Health:

1.       Drink plenty of water.
2.       Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3.       Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
4.       Live with the 3 E’s — Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5.       Make time to practice meditation, yoga, and prayer.
6.       Play more games.
7.       Read more books than you did in 2008.
8.       Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
9.       Sleep for 7 hours.
10.    Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:

11.    Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about..
12.    Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13.    Don’t over do. Keep your limits.
14.    Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
15.    Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
16.    Dream more while you are awake.
17.    Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18.    Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past.
That will ruin your present happiness.
19.    Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don’t hate others.
20.    Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
21.    No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22.    Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of
the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you
learn will last a lifetime.
23.    Smile and laugh more.
24.    You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:

25.    Call your family often.
26.    Each day give something good to others.
27.    Forgive everyone for everything.
28.    Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
29.    Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30.    What other people think of you is none of your business.
31.    Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:

32.    Do the right thing!
33.    Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
34.    GOD heals everything.
35.    However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
36.    No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37.    The best is yet to come.
38.    When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.
39.    Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

Last but not the least:

40.    Please share this with everyone you care about.

The Nest is Emptying

A week from Tuesday, my 19 year-old daughter, Cindi, will be moving out and into the University of Wisconsin-Parkside college dorm, as a Sophomore. She went to school last year, but commuted the 30+ miles every day of the week. With the rising cost of gasoline, and her desire to focus more on school, we’ve come to the conclusion it would be better for her all the way around to move into the dorm.

I like the idea. I’m glad she’s doing it. That doesn’t mean I won’t miss her. Cindi and I are very close, and it’s going to be difficult when she leaves. I’ll probably sob like a baby, but I know she has to do this.

Twenty-one-year-old Kelli moved out last April. She gave us one day’s notice, had no firm plan and no money. I was frantic. Funny enough though, she is making it – barely, but making it. When Kelli left, I didn’t think I was going to survive it.

All these years, Tom and I have been “dreaming” about the empty nest – wishing for it, anticipating it, wanting it. And yet, now that it is almost completely upon us, I’m not too crazy about it. The truth is, I want my children around me. I want them around me forever. They are constantly on my mind and in my heart. Whatever happened to the nuclear family? What was so wrong with that set-up? It doesn’t seem right that we’ve got this big four-bedroom, four-bath house, and no kids to fill it up with.

Our son stays with us, but only because he can’t afford to move out yet. If he could, he’d be out there in a heartbeat, away from me. If he could, he would get as far away from me as he could possibly make it. That doesn’t seem right.

But I remember when all I wanted in my life was to get away from my parents. I wanted my own place in the world. I wanted responsibility. I wanted confidence. I wanted to grow up. When it comes down to it, I don’t really want my children to grow up. I’d be happy if they were little again.

I know this is the way life is supposed to be; that my children are supposed to grow up and leave me, but I don’t have to like it. I don’t have to ever get used to it, and I honestly don’t think I ever will. That’s not a complaint, just a fact, and I needed to express it.

Perhaps when they marry and bring me grandchildren, I’ll be able to get the big picture. But until then, I’m not buying into the “niceties” of the empty nest. Just as I never received a manual when the children were born, I don’t quite know how to handle this leaving home business. I guess it’ll come in time; raising them did. I sure have been blessed to have had that experience.

The truth is I know it’ll all work out. It’s just going to take me a little time to get used to the idea of the empty nest.

The Charm of a Small Town

There’s something good to be said about small towns. I was born, raised and lived for 40 years in a small city about 40 miles north of Chicago. Waukegan, Illinois, a bustling metropolis of about 80,000 ((not a small town), is best known as the birthplace of Jack Benny and author Ray Bradbury.

In summertime, mom and dad would pack up the family of seven and head on down to Litchfield, Illinois, where my mother was originally from. Litchfield is about 30 miles south of the Capital of Springfield. In the ‘60’s and ‘70’s when I was a kid, Litchfield had a population of only about 7,200, and today it’s actually gotten smaller at about 6,800.

Yes, we were used to living in a busier environment with its factories, churches, banks and most of all, traffic. One would think we’d be bored in a small town like Litchfield, but we weren’t. I had some of the best times of my life there.

My mother was the seventh child of nine, born to Levin and Margaret. She was born on Christmas Day in 1929, just about two months after the stock market crash, right in the throws of the Great Depression. Her father, about 80% deaf, worked as a carnival photographer and was often away from home. Her mother was a homemaker and hospital housekeeper, and they were not in the least very well off. They lived in a small house and often did not know where their next meal would come from, but somehow they got through those tough times.

I loved my Grandma C. (last names withheld) very much. I can remember her as far back as age 72. The one thing I remember most about her is that she always suffered severely with rheumatoid arthritis; took several Bufferin each day, and drank the hottest, blackest Maxwell House coffee you could ever imagine. She hurt constantly, and we kids were always scared to death we were going to make it worse by embracing her or even going near her. I can remember my cousin, Janice, saying, “Don’t step on Grandmaw’s feet, don’t step on Grandmaw’s hurtin’ feet.” She lived until she was 86 years old, the last five years in a nursing home.

I think the members of a community relying on one another are something that a small town has that bigger towns and cities don’t have as much of. Mom had many friends back home in Litchfield. We’d stroll downtown to the Rexall or the Fashion Lane, and at every turn, there was someone to say hello to or enjoy a visit with. That’s how small towns are. Everybody knows each other. They care for one another.

I can remember very much enjoying spending time with my Uncle Earl, a bachelor all his life. Uncle Earl was kind of a kid himself in many ways, and he related to us little ones quite naturally. He was gifted at gardening and painting and drawing and he could play accordian by ear! I can remember him teaching me how peach seeds have to germinate in the sun a certain amount of time before they can be planted. I must have been about eight years old. He really enjoyed we kids. He often would put us all in a wagon and hook it up to the back of his riding lawn mower and give us rides all evening long, all around their yard, which was about a half acre. That was fun. He never got tired of us. Our parents never worried about us when we were with Uncle Earl.

When the carnival came to town, Uncle Earl, was right there with an open wallet and the enthusiasm of a child. He didn’t have a lot of money, as he worked as a dishwasher in a hotel for many years, but he always found plenty to take my sister and me on at least five or six rides. We’d have a ball together.

One time, Uncle Earl walked my sister, Tammy, and I down to Mohr’s Grocery store, about three blocks West on Jones Street. The road had been newly oiled and was scorching hot in the August sun. Tammy and I hadn’t bothered to put any shoes on that day, and we started crying, as our feet were burning like fire. My Uncle Earl, a big man of about 6 feet tall, picked up both Tammy and I, held us each in one arm, walked us to Mohr’s, bought us a 7-cent Popsicle, and carried us all the way back home. He didn’t complain for a minute. I think he would have made a good dad.

When we’d visit Litchfield, if it was summer, we would camp at Hillsboro Lake, about 12 miles East. In winter, we would stay at the family homestead at 914 South Montgomery. It was a 4-room house, with no indoor plumbing, but was always plenty inviting to us. It sure was cold in winter, and every morning about 5 o’clock, my Uncle George would shovel the coal into the big black pot belly stove that stood in the middle of the living room. I don’t think that stove ever generated much heat, but he’d do it anyway – every morning, without fail.

I had about twenty-five cousins and eight aunts and uncles not including the spouses. I can remember enjoying family picnics out at Walton Park or Lake Lou Yaeger. We’d be out there from early afternoon until dusk enjoying each other’s company. The adults all talked at once and we kids would horse around with one another until somebody would get mildly injured and start crying. My dad would make us settle down for a little bit, which was basically taking a time out to rest, but then we’d be right back having a good time.

My Aunt Mary and Uncle Gene were night owls, as opposed to my Aunt Helen and my Uncle Marshall, who went to bed every night by about 8:30 or 9:00 p.m. My folks weren’t ready to settle in for the night by nine, so we would often take a ride over to Mary and Gene’s on Madison to visit. They were always happy to see us, no matter the time. Even after my mother died, and we’d go to Litchfield, we stayed true to form and would visit them later in the evening. Aunt Mary had five children, 19 grandchildren and who knows how many great grandchildren, and her living room and dining room were filled to the ceilings with pictures of all those kids. We had plenty to talk about.

My Aunt Ruth was about 80% deaf, like her dad. She was married to my Uncle Eddie, who was a maintenance engineer at St. Francis Hospital in town. You couldn’t tell Ruth you liked something in her house, because once you said you liked it, she’d want to give it to you. I can remember her forcing dish towels on my mom one time. It may sound cliché, but those were good times. And man, she sure could cook! That lady could make an apple pie to put you on your knees and thank the Lord!

And speaking of cooking, my Aunt Helen was fabulous too. Heck, all my aunts were. We’d go over to Aunt Helen and Uncle Marshall’s place there on Lincoln, and Helen would never sit down to visit. She was too busy taking care of us. She was real hyper, and it made her happy to serve us as guests in her home. I have to mention too that she and Uncle Marshall were nuts in love. Boy, she always thought he was the cat’s meow, and vice versa. They never did anything inappropriate, but you could just tell. Today, at 92 and 94, they are both in the nursing home over on Illinois Avenue, and still nearly inseparable.

There were some not-so-fun times in Litchfield too, as my Uncle Bob was a very ill alcoholic, but I’m not going to dwell on those times. I’m also happy to say that he conquered that problem and was sober the last 10 years of his life. I like to focus on my fondest memories of when Uncle Chris, Aunt Pat and our family would all come down from Waukegan and visit the family in Litchfield.

My Aunt Mary, Aunt Helen, Aunt Pat, and Uncle Earl survive their parents and brothers and sisters today, and I’m happy to say that we’re going to trek on down to Litchfield this August for another visit. It will be one of the first times in a few years we’re not actually going for a funeral. I still have plenty of cousins down there to picnic with, and maybe we’ll take a ride out to the cemetery too.

Litchfield might not be much to some folks, but it’s a world of wonderful memories to me.

Why is it that…

Last night as I was lying down to sleep and after I said my nightly prayers, I got to thinking about what I might write about in my next blog. I have always had a curious mind and have often asked the question, “Why?” Here are some observations that I’ve made in my lifetime.

Why is it when you’re in a public bathroom, and there are 20 stalls or so, and you choose a stall far away from everyone else, that someone else comes into the bathroom and chooses the stall right next to yours? Now remember, there are at least 15 stalls to choose from, most of them far away from you, but she chooses the one next to you. Why is that? Doesn’t that seem kind of strange? Just askin’.

Why is it that whenever I have diarrhea and I tell my stepmother, she asks the question, “What color is it?” She does this with my snot too, by the way. Why is that? Why is it necessary for her to know the color of my excrement? I’ll tell you why! My stepmother can diagnose whatever ails you by the color of your void material! My poor dad can’t take a private trip into the bathroom without her reminding him not to flush. What is that about? Apparently, if your poop is dark black, you may have a bleeding ulcer or cancer. This is definite if there’s blood in it. If your poop is a yellowish dun color, you have the stomach flu. I don’t remember what green means. Where she gets this? I do not know. She also becomes concerned if you don’t poop after a couple days, so she keeps tabs on that for my dad too. I find that a little disturbing, and wonder if I’m going to need to know the color, texture and frequency of my husband’s poop some day. I guess it could happen, but I sure hope not.

I have a lot more things I wonder about; not just bathroom things. Like why do people pierce themselves, especially their tongues? What is the pleasure in that? I’ve been told it’s for sexual reasons, but I can’t imagine putting myself through so much pain for sex. But then again, maybe others would. Isn’t it bad enough when a person asks, “Do you want fries with that?” than to say, “Do you mant fried wit dat?” I’m just sayin’ they sound like they have a mouth full of change.

Why is it that every time we make or break camp, it’s raining? I don’t think anything more about that needs to be said. I don’t want to anger God, that’s for sure.

Why have six remotes? Isn’t our technology advanced enough today that we can do all the things we need to do with just one remote? I mean we need to change the t.v. channels, watch DVD’s, record VHS tapes to DVD, digitally record t.v. shows, play CD’s, turn on the fan and operate our computers, so why can’t we do all that with just one remote? Why hasn’t just one universal remote been invented? Wouldn’t that make things easier? This is just another one of my “why-isms”.

Why is it today that many young people feel that they have to wear their pants half-way off their butts? Who came up with this fashion idea? I’m just not getting that one.

Why do people still smoke? This is a big one for me. I can’t understand after all we’ve learned about smoking and the harm that it causes to the smoker and everybody else who has to breathe in the smoke, that people are still smoking. And why do young people start smoking? That’s weird. I can understand older people have the habit, and it’s a tough habit to break, so they don’t quit for whatever reason (maybe they can’t), but after all we know about smoking, why do young people start up? That’s just strange to me. But I digress.

Why is it absolutely unfathomable to touch your seat partner in an airplane? Why is that? About a month ago, I was on a very scary flight, and without thinking, I touched the arm of the gentlemen on my right. I was immediately apologetic to him, feeling I had committed a very big no no. It just isn’t politically correct to touch your seat neighbor. How come? Why did I feel the need to apologize so profusely to him? Who knows and who made up that rule?

Why is it that after my Uncle Marshall accidentally dropped the Thanksgiving turkey on the American Legion Hall floor while carving it, we still ate that turkey without flinching? It’s not like there wasn’t more turkey. I think we had three birds all together that year.

When you’re pregnant, why is it that everybody and their brother’s uncle’s cousin feels a need to touch your stomach without your permission, and they do it? It’s “anything goes” when you’re pregnant. Aren’t there any rules to follow? If not, why not? They don’t touch your boobs, at least they didn’t when I was having babies. Heck, maybe things have changed and they do touch your boobs now. Maybe that rule is out the window too now.

Why is a food that is as good as corn on the cob so messy and difficult to eat? Why can’t it taste lousy and therefore be undesirable like Brussells sprouts or asparagus?

There are some questions that just can’t be answered I guess. Still, I wonder… I guess I’m just an incessant smart alec. That’s the rumor anyway.