The Turkey Shot Out of the Oven

Jack Prelutsky

The turkey shot out of the oven
and rocketed into the air,
it knocked every plate off the table
and partly demolished a chair.

It ricocheted into a corner
and burst with deafening boom,
then splattered all over the kitchen,
completely obscuring the room.

It stuck to the walls and the windows,
it totally coated the floor,
there was turkey attached to the ceiling,
where there’d never been turkey before.

It blanketed every appliance,
it smeared every saucer and bowl,
there wasn’t a way I could stop it,
that turkey was out of control.

I scraped and I scrubbed with displeasure,
and thought with chagrin as I mopped,
that I’d never again stuff a turkey
with popcorn that hadn’t been popped.

Thoughts of Thanksgiving

Charles Frederick White

Thanksgiving day is coming soon,
That long remembered day
When nature gives her blessed boon
To all America.

On that glad day, in all our land,
The people, in their wake,
Give thanks to God, whose mighty hand
Deals blessings good and great.

The roast goose, steaming on the plate,
The sweet potato cobbler,
The cranberry sauce, the pudding baked,
The seasoned turkey gobbler,­

All these delights and many more,
From north, south, west and east,
Do all the nation keep in store
For this Thanksgiving feast.

Alas, for those who are denied
This blessed boon of God!
May all the needy be supplied
Like Israel by the rod.

1895

Thanksgiving

By: Edgar Albert Guest

Gettin’ together to smile an’ rejoice,
An’ eatin’ an’ laughin’ with folks of your choice;
An’ kissin’ the girls an’ declarin’ that they
Are growin more beautiful day after day;
Chattin’ an’ braggin’ a bit with the men,
Buildin’ the old family circle again;
Livin’ the wholesome an’ old-fashioned cheer,
Just for awhile at the end of the year.

Greetings fly fast as we crowd through the door
And under the old roof we gather once more
Just as we did when the youngsters were small;
Mother’s a little bit grayer, that’s all.
Father’s a little bit older, but still
Ready to romp an’ to laugh with a will.
Here we are back at the table again
Tellin’ our stories as women an men.

Bowed are our heads for a moment in prayer;
Oh, but we’re grateful an’ glad to be there.
Home from the east land an’ home from the west,
Home with the folks that are dearest an’ best.
Out of the sham of the cities afar
We’ve come for a time to be just what we are.
Here we can talk of ourselves an’ be frank,
Forgettin’ position an’ station an’ rank.

Give me the end of the year an’ its fun
When most of the plannin’ an’ toilin’ is done;
Bring all the wanderers home to the nest,
Let me sit down with the ones I love best,
Hear the old voices still ringin’ with song,
See the old faces unblemished by wrong,
See the old table with all of its chairs
An I’ll put soul in my Thanksgivin’ prayers.

Changes

Blessings

I knelt to pray when day was done
And prayed, “O Lord, bless everyone,
Lift from each saddened heart the pain
And let the sick be well again.”
And then I woke another day
And carelessly went on my way,
The whole day long I did not try
To wipe a tear from any eye.
I did not try to share the load
Of any brother on the road.
I did not even go to see
The sick man just next door to me.
Yet once again when day was done
I prayed, “O Lord, bless everyone.”
But as I prayed, into my ear
there came a voice that whispered clear,
“Pause now, my son, before you pray.
Whom have you tried to bless today?
Gods sweetest blessing always go
by hands that serve him here below.”
And then I hid my face and cried,
“Forgive me, God, I have not tried,
But let me live another day
and I will live the way I pray.”

Lemon Poppy Seed Cake in A JAR

Amount Measure Ingredient — Preparation Method——————————–
4 12 oz * BALL — ™ QUILTED CRYSTAL
– JELLY JARS
8 NEW LIDS — (do not use old
– ones)
8 RINGS — (OK to use old ones)
VEGETABLE SHORTENING — (to grease jars)
1 cup YELLOW CORN MEAL
1 cup ALL-PURPOSE FLOUR
4 tablespoons GRANULATED SUGAR
1 teaspoon BAKING SODA
2 teaspoons CREAM OF TARTAR
3/4 teaspoon SALT
1 cup SOUR CREAM
1/4 cup BUTTERMILK
2 large EGGS
4 tablespoons BUTTER — melted
Sterilize the jars, lids and rings by boiling them for 15 minutes. Keep the lids and rings in the water until you’re ready to use them. Make sure there are no nicks or cracks in the lips of the jars. Remove the jars from the water and place them on a clean dish towel to air-dry (up, not upside down). Once the jars are cool, using a pastry brush, grease the inside of each jar with shortening (DO NOT use PAM, Baker’s Secret, butter or margarine). Preheat oven to 325-degrees (NO HIGHER!). Place a cookie sheet onto the middle rack of the oven, remove the top rack. Combine the corn meal, flour, baking soda, cream of tartar, and salt; mix well. Quickly add the sour cream, milk, eggs and butter. Stir JUST until mixed, don’t over-mix! Divide the batter among the 4 canning jars (should be slightly less than 1/2 full). I’ve never tried this bread in canning jars, so I’m not sure how many you’ll need–4 should be enough. Sterilize a few more just in case. Wipe the sides of the jar off in case you slop or it’ll burn. Place jars onto the cookie sheet. Bake for about 30 minutes, or until bread tests done with a toothpick or cake tester. It should come out clean, not runny. Test it! When the bread tests done, using HEAVY-DUTY MITTS (the jars ARE HOT!) remove them from the oven one-by-one and place the lids and rings on them and screw down tightly. Keep the lids in the hot water until you’re ready to use them. Place the jars on your counter to cool. You’ll be able to tell if they’ve sealed, you should hear a “plinking” sound. If you don’t hear the noise, check the jars once they’ve cooled by pressing down on the lids, they shouldn’t move at all. Store the jars in a cool, dry place, just as you would any canned goods. There’s NO need to refrigerate the breads, they keep in the pantry for about 6 months–maybe longer- – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - -

Rich Corn Bread In A Jar

Amount Measure Ingredient — Preparation Method——————————–
4 12 oz * BALL — ™ QUILTED CRYSTAL
– JELLY JARS
8 NEW LIDS — (do not use old
– ones)
8 RINGS — (OK to use old ones)
VEGETABLE SHORTENING — (to grease jars)
1 cup YELLOW CORN MEAL
1 cup ALL-PURPOSE FLOUR
4 tablespoons GRANULATED SUGAR
1 teaspoon BAKING SODA
2 teaspoons CREAM OF TARTAR
3/4 teaspoon SALT
1 cup SOUR CREAM
1/4 cup BUTTERMILK
2 large EGGS
4 tablespoons BUTTER — melted
Sterilize the jars, lids and rings by boiling them for 15 minutes. Keep the lids and rings in the water until you’re ready to use them. Make sure there are no nicks or cracks in the lips of the jars. Remove the jars from the water and place them on a clean dish towel to air-dry (up, not upside down). Once the jars are cool, using a pastry brush, grease the inside of each jar with shortening (DO NOT use PAM, Baker’s Secret, butter or margarine). Preheat oven to 325-degrees (NO HIGHER!). Place a cookie sheet onto the middle rack of the oven, remove the top rack. Combine the corn meal, flour, baking soda, cream of tartar, and salt; mix well. Quickly add the sour cream, milk, eggs and butter. Stir JUST until mixed, don’t over-mix! Divide the batter among the 4 canning jars (should be slightly less than 1/2 full). I’ve never tried this bread in canning jars, so I’m not sure how many you’ll need–4 should be enough. Sterilize a few more just in case. Wipe the sides of the jar off in case you slop or it’ll burn. Place jars onto the cookie sheet. Bake for about 30 minutes, or until bread tests done with a toothpick or cake tester. It should come out clean, not runny. Test it! When the bread tests done, using HEAVY-DUTY MITTS (the jars ARE HOT!) remove them from the oven one-by-one and place the lids and rings on them and screw down tightly. Keep the lids in the hot water until you’re ready to use them. Place the jars on your counter to cool. You’ll be able to tell if they’ve sealed, you should hear a “plinking” sound. If you don’t hear the noise, check the jars once they’ve cooled by pressing down on the lids, they shouldn’t move at all. Store the jars in a cool, dry place, just as you would any canned goods. There’s NO need to refrigerate the breads, they keep in the pantry for about 6 months–maybe longer- – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - -

Rich Corn Bread In A Jar

Amount Measure Ingredient — Preparation Method——————————–
4 12 oz * BALL — ™ QUILTED CRYSTAL
– JELLY JARS
8 NEW LIDS — (do not use old
– ones)
8 RINGS — (OK to use old ones)
VEGETABLE SHORTENING — (to grease jars)
1 cup YELLOW CORN MEAL
1 cup ALL-PURPOSE FLOUR
4 tablespoons GRANULATED SUGAR
1 teaspoon BAKING SODA
2 teaspoons CREAM OF TARTAR
3/4 teaspoon SALT
1 cup SOUR CREAM
1/4 cup BUTTERMILK
2 large EGGS
4 tablespoons BUTTER — melted
Sterilize the jars, lids and rings by boiling them for 15 minutes. Keep the lids and rings in the water until you’re ready to use them. Make sure there are no nicks or cracks in the lips of the jars. Remove the jars from the water and place them on a clean dish towel to air-dry (up, not upside down). Once the jars are cool, using a pastry brush, grease the inside of each jar with shortening (DO NOT use PAM, Baker’s Secret, butter or margarine). Preheat oven to 325-degrees (NO HIGHER!). Place a cookie sheet onto the middle rack of the oven, remove the top rack. Combine the corn meal, flour, baking soda, cream of tartar, and salt; mix well. Quickly add the sour cream, milk, eggs and butter. Stir JUST until mixed, don’t over-mix! Divide the batter among the 4 canning jars (should be slightly less than 1/2 full). I’ve never tried this bread in canning jars, so I’m not sure how many you’ll need–4 should be enough. Sterilize a few more just in case. Wipe the sides of the jar off in case you slop or it’ll burn. Place jars onto the cookie sheet. Bake for about 30 minutes, or until bread tests done with a toothpick or cake tester. It should come out clean, not runny. Test it! When the bread tests done, using HEAVY-DUTY MITTS (the jars ARE HOT!) remove them from the oven one-by-one and place the lids and rings on them and screw down tightly. Keep the lids in the hot water until you’re ready to use them. Place the jars on your counter to cool. You’ll be able to tell if they’ve sealed, you should hear a “plinking” sound. If you don’t hear the noise, check the jars once they’ve cooled by pressing down on the lids, they shouldn’t move at all. Store the jars in a cool, dry place, just as you would any canned goods. There’s NO need to refrigerate the breads, they keep in the pantry for about 6 months–maybe longer- – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - -

Bread In Jars: Pina Colada

Amount Measure Ingredient — Preparation Method ——————————–
1 can pineapple — (20 oz) crushed
1 c margarine — at room temperature
3 1/2 c brown sugar — packed
4 egg whites — whipped
1/2 c rum
3 1/3 c unbleached flour
1 1/2 tsps baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1 c coconut — shredded

Preheat oven at 325. Before starting batter, wash 8 (1 pint

) wide mouth
canning jars with lids in hot soapy water and let drain, dry, and cool to
room temperature. Generously prepare jars with cooking spray and flour.
Drain pineapple for 10 minutes, reserving juice. Puree drained pineapple
in a blender. Measure out 1 1/2 cups puree, adding a little juice if
necessary to make 1 1/2 cups. Set puree aside. Discard remaining juice.
In a mixing bowl, combine applesauce, half brown sugar until light and
fluffy. Beat in egg whites and pineapple puree. Set aside. In another
mixing bowl, combine flour, baking powder, and baking soda. Gradually, add
to pineapple mixture in thirds, beating well with each addition. Stir in
coconut. Spoon 1 level cupful of batter into each jar. Carefully wipe
rims clean, then place jars on baking sheet (or they’ll tip over) in the
center of oven. Bake 40 minutes. Keep lids in hot water until they’re
used. When cakes are done, remove jars which are HOT from oven one at a
time. If rims need cleaning, use moistened paper towel. Carefully put
lids and rings in place, then screw tops on tightly shut. Place jars on a
wire rack; they will seal as they cool.

Once jars are cool, decorate with round pieces of cloth and then glue on
flowers, ribbons, etc. on lid, ring and side of jar. Unscrew the ring (the
lid should be sealed by now) and place a few cotton balls on top of the lid
(makes it poofy on top), then a piece of cloth (about 3″ larger than thelid) on top and screw the ring back on. Decorate as desired (examplepinking shears

Bread In Jars: Gingerbread

Amount Measure Ingredient — Preparation Method ——————————– —-Supplies Needed—- 5 jars Ball (#14400-81400) — (12 oz) 8 new lids – don’t use old ones 8 rings okay to use old ones —-Batter—- 2 1/4 c unbleached flour 3/4 c granulated sugar 1 tsp baking soda 1/2 tsp baking powder 1/4 tsp salt 2 tsps ginger 1 tsp cinnamon 1/2 tsp cloves 3/4 c margarine — softened 3/4 c water 1/2 c molasses Preheat oven at 325. Place a baking sheet onto middle rack and remove top rack from oven. Before starting batter, wash jars, lids, and rings in hot soapy water and let drain, dry, and cool to room temperature. Generously prepare inside of jars with margarine. To prepare batter, combine flour, sugar, baking soda, baking powder, salt, ginger, cinnamon, and cloves in a mixing bowl. In another mixing bowl, combine margarine, water and molasses. Divide batter among 5 jars (should be slightly less than half full). Carefully wipe rims clean, then place jars on baking sheet (or they’ll tip over) in the center of oven. Bake 40 minutes. Keep lids in hot water until they’re used. When cakes are done, remove jars which are HOT from oven one at a time. If rims need cleaning, use moistened paper towel. Carefully put lids and rings in place, then screw tops on tightly shut. Place jars on a wire rack; they will seal as they cool. Once jars are cool, decorate with round pieces of cloth and then glue on flowers, ribbons, etc. on lid, ring and side of jar. Unscrew the ring (the lid should be sealed by now) and place a few cotton balls on top of the lid (makes it poofy on top), then a piece of cloth (about 3″ larger than the lid) on top and screw the ring back on. Decorate as desired (examplepinking shears).

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